Lizzie

"I cried with her as I held her for the first time, in shock that she was actually with us after what felt like a long road of secondary infertility. I’m so proud my bright eyed little girl was born surrounded by such incredible women, practicing the oldest and most sacred job" 

Homebirth was one of the easiest decisions of my life. Halfway through my first pregnancy, I realised the private hospital and my obstetrician probably wasn’t the best model of care for the birth I wanted. My obstetrician was fantastic, but I was very aware that she was trained for high risk scenarios, and I was not having a high risk pregnancy. Nonetheless, with her support I had my son with a physiological, intervention free, vaginal birth at 41+5 in a private hospital. I knew that my next pregnancy I would seriously investigate other options.  

I had three miscarriages before my next successful pregnancy and MAMA saw me through all 4 of these pregnancies.  

I chose home birth because I had confidence in my body and trusted the birth process, because I wanted a calm and quiet birth, and I really wanted continuity of care for 6 weeks postpartum. Breastfeeding for my eldest was really hard and I grieved that deeply. Having a care model with midwives that I knew and trusted to support my early breastfeeding journey (plus any additional support from MAMA lactation consultants) was so important to me.  

 My partner Owen took a little longer to be convinced by a home birth. His main concerns were about safety, but he had educated himself with my first birth and was completely on board with my preference for low or no intervention. Once we’d talked through the risks of home birth between ourselves and with our chief wise woman midwife Ellie, in particular understanding the low risk approach that MAMA takes, Owen was also looking forward to a home birth. Ellie also met my mum and eased her concerns about Homebirth with kindness and strength.  

I was worried that with a history of miscarriage, I would be fairly anxious with the home birth pregnancy approach of fewer scans (my last one was 21 weeks), but I actually found this extremely calming. Listening to my baby’s heartbeat and tuning into my body and baby was much more reassuring than the constant scanning that happened in my first pregnancy.  

Ellie and I talked about how I wanted the birth to go - how I wanted her to talk to me if things weren’t going so well (gentle or tough love), and how/where I wanted the midwives to be while I laboured (next to me or in another space). I also felt so prepared with my options and the different circumstances that may result in a transfer to hospital. Unlike my private hospital experience, I felt really empowered and calm in the knowledge that if we did end up in hospital and/or with intervention, it was because the risk was higher than we were willing to accept. These were not conversations I ever had with my obstetrician.  

I was looking forward to birth until I got a virus about 7 weeks before going into labour. 7 weeks of coughing got me and my poor pelvic floor to 41+4. I went to sleep the night before with intense sinus pain. 1-2 hours of sleep and a lot of tossing and turning later, contractions started around 6am. By 7.30am things were ramping up so I called Ellie.  

 Midwives Charlotte, then Ellie, then student midwife Sophia arrived. The atmosphere was so calm and so relaxed compared to a hospital.  The midwives hung out in another room while I laboured, with Ellie or Charlotte quietly popping in every half an hour to check my blood pressure and baby’s heartbeat.  

I decided against a pool, and used a yoga ball, TENS machine, shower and my partner Owen’s gentle support. A few hours in, my contractions slowed right down in the shower. I was so disheartened but my body was screaming for rest. Ellie closed down the blinds to make everything dark and made some gentle suggestions about what we could try - a walk, a change in position, a nap.  

So I did the impossible and I napped in the middle of labour. 3-4 power naps between some lighter contractions got us back on track. My main hope for this birth was to experience the foetal ejection reflex and after an intense set of contractions I felt my body and baby take over. I remember asking Ellie if this was transition because it was so intense. While Ellie neither confirmed nor denied (cue lots of swearing in my head), thankfully it was and just two hours after waking up from my nap, our little Sadie baby calmly glided into Owen’s hands. 

I cried with her as I held her for the first time, in shock that she was actually with us after what felt like a long road of secondary infertility. I’m so proud my bright eyed little girl was born surrounded by such incredible women, practicing the oldest and most sacred job.  

Owen was shocked by how calm and relaxed the whole birth was. Compared to a hospital where people you don’t know are constantly coming in and out of the room, and asking questions in the middle of contractions. Sadie’s birth was uneventful and straightforward, in the best possible way.  

As I mentioned, one of the key reasons I picked MAMA was the 6 week post natal continuity of care. That period is so vulnerable and it was made so special and safe having Ellie, Charlotte, Sari and Sarah (LC) to cry and laugh with. 

Breastfeeding and weight gain was still a struggle, but I felt like my concerns were heard and validated by everyone at MAMA. While the advice wasn’t always what I wanted to hear, it was always provided gently, with the knowledge they had our best interest at heart and with the perspective of suggesting what I was comfortable doing. No shame, no guilt - just holding space for me while ensuring the best possible outcome for Sadie and I. Breastfeeding wasn’t exactly what I hoped for, but it was such a better and more supported experience than with my eldest.  

I’ve encountered private hospitals, public hospitals, specialists and GPS for pregnancy and miscarriage over the last 4 years, and can say that MAMA is one of the only places I’ve encountered where my opinion has been heard, validated and believed first and foremost.  From midwives, the reception team (who are the sweetest, most helpful, patient and kind group of people), to the allied health professionals (who are brilliant and know so much you always feel confident you’re in the right hands), the whole team at MAMA envelop you in support. There is no greater gift in women’s and maternal health. 

Birth story by Lizzie.